Eastern Oregon: Deer, Joel Osteen, and Equine Science.

So, here I am. I'm currently in the great city of Redmond, OR...but lets start at the very beginning. After listening to the Speak Now album by Taylor Swift (since I was going to be in "country land"), I entered Eastern Oregon with the excitement of a nineteen year old stuck in the dos and don'ts of love.

The first day brought some unwanted emotions. WARNING: THIS STORY IS NOT FUNNY. (If you want to pass this one, I have included where it is okay to laugh). I visited one school where I had the pleasure of talking with one student who was highly interested and is going to be a great prospect. It then turned to something a little different. One student, who was a little odd, asked me if I was a rep for a college in which I responded "yes." He then felt that this was sufficient conversation for the time being.
He then returned with another question "Do you have to be actively participating in Christianity to go there?"
I responded with an emphatic "Yes, you do."
As if I had offered him vinegar, he quickly backed away and shook his hands in front of him from left to right and said "No...thanks...no...I'm...uhm...No...I'm agnostic."
I then responded quickly with "Hey, that's alright."
This haunted me quite literally for the entire afternoon. I just said "hey, that's alright" to someone who just expressed that they were intentionally against the idea of a God. I was responding from a "counselor's" mindset as far as "hey, you don't believe in Christianity, well then that's okay...you're not the kind of student I'm recruiting." However, the "Christian" part of me just sank. I couldn't stop thinking about him. He had expressed his false beliefs and I passively breezed over it as if it were no big deal. Quite literally, this student is going to face the ultimate punishment and I didn't do anything to try and help him. I wasn't visited by any other students the entire visit and I wanted him to desperately come by again so I could talk with him about his choice to pursue agnosticism. I didn't get the chance. This turned into a long conversation with Leah where I just had to remind myself that I am not ultimately responsible for his eternal decision; however, it was a good reminder to always be ready because we are always on the mission field.
Moral of the story is "Stay alert gang! Although we are recruiting, God may have bigger plans for our travel season."

YOU MAY LAUGH OR NOT LAUGH FROM NOW ON.
Monday evening brought a funny little frustration. Of course, I happended to pick the one hotel to stay in all week that doesn't have Wifi! Oh, they do have wifi; however, it's down this week for no apparent reason. I even called the company who supplied the wifi and tried to find out the inside scoop. That is how desperate I became. If any of you know...when I travel and i have time off...I quite literally stay in my hotel room. So, for me to be proactive in finding an answer is as monumental as the Pope playing "put-put golf" or sighting "Big Foot" (whichever one you enjoy better or think is cooler). So...that means frequent trips to Starbucks and the local library. Currently, I'm in a library with a sculpture of a naked baby reading a book directly behind me. Like that could ever happen! Look if a baby doesn't realize his pants are off...there's no way he's intelligent enough to read a book!

The next day I visited one high school where I walked in and I saw roughly about fifty students walking around with the noise level fairly high. Then this man came up to me and asked if I was Jordan and I replied "On most days!" hahahahahahahahaaha....NO. I said, "Yes."
It turns out that was the counselor and he said "They're all here for you!"
I then thought "Oh my goodness...how am I going to talk to all these students and keep thier attention without a microphone?"
The beginning of your presentation is very crucial. You have to get thier respect, keep thier attention, and choose your words carefully because if you don't win them over in the first minute...it turns painful for both parties.
I am happy to say it was one of the best visits I have ever had. The students were engaged, I made them laugh frequently (no big deal...), and I talked with multiple interested students after the presentation. I ended up staying there almost 90 minutes.
All this to say...Lois and Anita...look out for a surge in applications from Crook County High...this presentation was like a J.K. Rowling and the Victor Valley presentation was nothing more than a Stepanie Meyer. Know what I'm sayin'?..."There's a storm comin'" : )

Oh my goodness. I'm in the library...remember? There's this little girl just staring at me. She's got a ton of books and she's carrying them like a butler. What do you want? What is wrong with you? Haven't you ever seen an attractive man working on a 2003 giant laptop before? Move!!! You're making me feel like Quasimoto! Seriously! Keep moving?!?! Quit pushing your glasses up with your nose and face muscles! Use your hands! That's what God gave them to you for! See your optometrist! "HEY LITTLE GIRL, QUIT STARING AT ME!" (I'm yelling this with my eyes...oh she knows what I'm sayin'...."

Anyways, back to my week. I had an awesome surprise. My beautiful, young and able wife, LEAH, the queen of Jordania, came to visit me on Tuesday and Wednesday! So I met up with Leah around six and we went to dinner. The first dinner we had was at Izzy's. I haven't been to Izzy's since I was probably like 10 years old; however, I remember thier pizza tasting like a symphony of angels. So, I roped Leah into going. If I love the pizza so much, why have I not been back? Well...a couple reasons. First, something happened with my parents and all of a sudden we never went there. I think I remember my mom saying something about people sneezing in the salad buffet, but I didn't mind...I was a kid...I had the immune system of a quail! The other thing was...there was this waiter that I still remember to this day and he had some sort of disease. I think it was alopecia and he was sort of balding at 23 (which happens), but his hair dropped into one of our waters and thus we've never been back to Izzy's till this week. Well, I'm happy to report that the pizza is as good as I remember!

The second and final dinner Leah and I shared was not very momentous; however, the car ride was. As we were driving towards the restaurant we passed two teenagers, a boy and a girl, who were pretending they were bread and they were making a sandwich; they were practicing CPR, yet neither was having trouble breathing; they were trying to not let the metaphorical sphere between thier bodies drop on the ground, yet there was no competition...do you see what I'm saying? They were going at each other like two horizontal meerkats. Thats not all though...they are literally laying directly on the sidewalk with both sets of legs laying over the curb and into the street. They were doing all of this on the sidewalk/curb of thier neigborhood and even worse...when we drove by...no flinching...no moving...just caring on with thier version of "Tangled," which would not be rated-G.
I couldn't believe it, plus I've never seen that done on a curb...but Leah...all she could say was "How does that work?","That doesn't look comfortable.", "Its cold. Why don't they wear a jacket?" etc.
So we eat our dinner and head back to the hotel without wifi if you remember. We get to the intersection and guess what...
THEY ARE STILL THERE!!!!!!!!!!
This has been over 90 minutes and they are still there. Different positions, but same story. Only this time she was sitting like he was a bull and she was entered in the PBR championships. Plus, I think he thought she was a magic lamp because uhm...he was caressing her like a genie was coming shortly...oh and by the way...still on the sidewalk...no pillow...with thier bodies stretching into the road...I wanted to honk...but I could just stare in disbelief. I went by that intersection today...and I almost half expected them to both be there.

The questions of the week is: "Do you have equine science?" It's funny how, based on the territory, you get common questions. Central California didn't care much about horses, but here...I'm afraid to say I find horses arrogant, too good for society, and awfully picky on who they decide can ride them. But, I've decided to keep my mouth shut because thier haunches have the power to make me very good friends with a chair on wheels.

One random thing that happened, is I showed up to one of my school visits and the counselor came up to me in a royal purple choir robe, with Mardi Gras beads around his neck and a unique hat. This hat was like that of the Mad Hatter in Alice in Wonderland...except this one was covered in Chinchilla. Then another counselor was dressed similarly and the secretary the same. I found out shortly after...it was Spirit Week. Whew!

Today was the Central Oregon national fair at the Expo Center. First of all, I'm happy to say that I made friends! I met a couple counselors and we talked, plus GFU guy came and we talked a little too! I felt very connected as a counselor.
This fair was CRAZY! I literally ran out of materials within 1 hour! UP ran out of info. after 30 minutes! So, thankfully I had plenty of inquiry cards, and I hoarded a couple brochures for my visits tomorrow. It was so unbelievable. I think I got like 60 cards filled out from this one fair. It was the most successful fair I've ever been to...but next year we have to bring an entire box of brochures. I talked with some of the other counselors and they said they pack extra boxes just for this fair. There were about 2500 students that came through so it was busy! It was three hours, but it flew by. In that time though, you're bound to have some weird conversations right? Right.

Oh and the Joel Osteen thing. I watched a very interesting interview with him and Piers Morgan on Tuesday evening. Do you guys know what denomination he is? I thought he was kind of a joker...I know... I judged the book by its cover...but he did say some good things...so I shall not rest till I know who he is and where he stands!

First, one student asked me what is your "something community like". I couldn't quite hear her, so I asked "What was that?"
"What is your gay community like?"
"Oh...gay community? Well, it's not going to be very prominent at Corban. But I say that when I actually mean its kind of 'non-existent'".
"Oh...okay."
"Nice to meet you though."

Then there was this one. This girl reminded me of one of those cartoons where they have really big eyes and a small body. Like all you can see are giant eyes and glasses usually with tiny feet.
"Do you think animals go to heaven?"
Okay, this goes down as STRIKE ONE. She could be serious, but my guard is up because if she continues with these types of questions, she might just be playing with me because our table cloths says "God" and she wants to mess with me.
"Well, I think there will be animals in heaven, but, like, whether my dog will be going to heaven? I don't really know. That's a tricky question. What do you think?"
"My dog has cancer."
This could actually be real. She might be asking me because she's upset about her dog...so guard down a little bit.
"Oh, I'm sorry about that."
"Will you pray for her?" she says with no emotion.
STRIKE TWO! No real student with this problem would be so bold so quickly. Consider my guard is up again. Then she says to me...
"Will you hold my hands and pray for her?" as she stretches her hands towards me.
STRIKE THREE MISSY! No real student, or student who is looking at a four-year university, would ask me these questions in such quick concession. You've been found out. I respond,
"No, I'm sorry I wont. I will pray though."
"Okay."
Then as she leaves, she turns back and says "Don't forget to pray!"
Oh boy, did she just mock the gift of prayer? That does not sit well with me...no it does not.

And that is where I am as of now. It's Thursday night with just one more day left before I'm back in our great city of Salem!

Miss you guys...see you soon!